Monday, May 17, 2010

you don't get it.

Tell me what you know about no pain, no gain? I'm the kinda girl that likes to play with fire and dance in the rain.


Life has been good. Stressful at times. sucky sometimes. up and down, all around. quiet, lonely, annoying, crazy, amazing, bizarre, interesting, challenging, ridiculous, spontaneous, d i f f e r e n t all the time...

hm. That's life! it's great to be alive.


IAMAbeautifulcarefreeworthwhile&pureyoungwoman.

butterfly<3

Thursday, May 6, 2010

for what it's worth.

I'm really hoping this is the last time that I feel so broken, but I know im just lying to myself if I believed that.

The truth is when we fall in love we must accept that one day this thing called love could end. Just like anything else in life, things could change. Something that was once seen as beautiful, could turn so ugly, twisted and/or complicated that we don't even recognize it anymore. We must accept that one day we might get hurt. This is a cost of falling in love, but at the same time we take this risk.. Because love isn't always ugly. However, it's hard to see why we got into something when all we see is misery. It's difficult to remember...we just don't want to.

They say it's better to have loved and lost than to have never have loved at all. I guess I agree with this, even though right now.. I'm wishing the opposite. I know, though, that this is all part of my process and that I will eventually see this as an opportunity to learn and grow. Perhaps one day I'll understand.. But as for right now...

I'm just hurt.

But I'm not going to let myself hurt over this for long... because if it was meant to be, then it would be... and I can't try so hard or throw myself at something when I'm just going to get hurt over and over again. It's not fair. I need to move on... even though at times I feel like I can't. I know I am strong.

So here I am.. I just bared my heart and soul. You probably still don't care.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

"when your love has gone,

you carry on. this is a song for no one."



having been hurt again and again. having fallen in love again & again.
i can honestly say, that it's been a rocky road filled with smiles, laughs, trials and tears.
many times i've thought to give up, but i couldn't.
having bared my heart & soul... being so comfortable but uncomfortable at the same time.
can't help but wish sometimes that we never got into this. wonder what things would be like if we had never been.

but then again, i think of all the wonderful times and i realize that it may have been all worth it.

i have NO IDEA where we are now. so confused. i wish it never got so confusing, and things just stayed simple. i don't even know where all this is coming from 'cos it seems like things were just fine a bit ago.

story of it all. one endless cycle of tears and joy.