remember this feeling.

this is a feeling that nothing or nobody could take away from me.

let's hope it stays, even when tomorrow comes.

a drive.

we smile and laugh as the album plays. i look at you a million ways.

we tell childhood times, or funny times... any times, actually.

we talk about now. the future. everything.

sometimes we think we talk too much. an awkward silence is never enough.

sometimes we get confused and we'll laugh at each other.

sometimes we realize... what we're fighting over doesn't even matter.

"oh, this feeling," we say, could never be described.

i used to be a caterpillar, struggling to be alive. now i'm a butterfly, beginning to witness life from above.

this is why i embrace change.

it led me to love.

just a little bit.

and just like that,

i forgot what i was talking about.

and where i was.

and who i was with.

undo.

uncomfortable.

unbelievable.

III. i couldn't believe what i just heard.

the music turned off...

but i still hear it.

and it was like i never heard it before.

it's

making

more

and more

sense.

i won't ever let it happen again.

i want to feel this way forever.

(contigo)

(avec toi)

(with you)

you never knew.

now you know.

i.

love.

you.

i want:

$$

higher knowledge.

happiness.

success.

more peace.

more love.

more unity.

more respect.

seeing life through brighter eyes.

this world.

it won't stop for you. it won't wait for you. the world won't stop when you are down and out. some people leave just as quickly as they come in. some people don't know if they're in or out, up or down. it's never too late to start over. you've never learned enough. you've never heard enough. there's always room for improvement. people become what they hate, but only for a short while, only to learn -- we are 'only human.' and we were not born to be perfect all the time.

happiness exists.

perfection exists.

perfection exists in happiness.

t h i s i s f a t e

w r i t i n g i t s e l f o u t.

did i forget something?

i used to be good at saying it the way it is.

the way things were seemed so clear now that i think about it.

or maybe it didn't make sense at all, and i tried so much harder to make sense of it.

i am not so easily inspired these days to talk about things the way they are.

maybe i think too much nowadays. have i become too analytical?

have things changed? or am i still the same?

i wonder if it's bad that i ask so many questions now.

i know some questions, i could answer myself.

sometimes i look back at who i used to be and wonder why i'm not that anymore.

did i like it better? did you like it better?

am i thinking too much again?

i just read something, just now.

it reminded me of how i used to feel so much more sure of where i was.

even though, back then i thought that was so stupid.

it's like i wanted to feel lost.

and now i have to start over again.

remember.

remember.

remember.

i need to remember.

i'll be back with more.

soon.

if this is love

then get me the fuck out.

* * * *

it doesn't feel any better,
but it doesn't feel any worse.

it is the worst feeling,

to feel nothing at all.

but it is what it is and i can't change the way anyone feels.

unfortunately, i never saw this coming.

but, i bet everyone else did.

congratulations, you win.

bad, worse, worst.

shooting blanks.

i will be found.

it wasn't hard to find me before;

so, i will find myself again.

* * * *

sometimes i get so mad, i want to stay mad.

i know this is unfair, but you are sometimes too.

he wishes we were perfect. but i know i am not.

i wish we were perfect. but i know we are not.

i question things when they aren't right.

who doesn't?

i want to remember the way it was.

i want it to be the same.

i don't want things to change.

and if they do, i just want them to get better.

we hate when we fight... but we do.

times like these make me feel halfway to hopeless.

i get scared sometimes.

i wish i didn't.

* * * *

if only we could be what we always wanted to be.

oh! but we can.

nobody said it's easy all the time.

* * * *

it's so much easier nowadays for people to hide how they're actually feeling.

BE REAL.

who cares if that means tears.